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I attended the Child Abuse Symposium in Santa Clara County, California last Friday and heard a highly effective and important presentation by Dr. John Stirling, Director of the Center for Child Protection at Santa Clara Valley Medical Center and Medical Director of Santa Clara County’s Children Shelter.

Dr. Stirling presented the findings of the ACE (Adverse Childhood Experiences) study, a study that has been out for years, which shows a direct link between child mistreatment and adult health and well-being.

Here is a synopsis of the primary findings of the ACE  Study performed by Dr. Vincent Felitti. Fundamentally, the study found that childhood adversity has a direct correlation with adult disfunction and poor health.

Please read the synopsis of this important study:

http://xnet.kp.org/permanentejournal/winter02/goldtolead.html

51 year-old award winning MTV video director, Aswad Ayinde, has been charged with repeatedly raping and impregnating his daughters over decades and using extreme violence and threats to prevent them from telling the authorities.

Ayinde, who won an MTV award for directing The Fugees’ “Killing Me Softly,” fathered six kids with his daughters from the mid-1980s to 2002 – and delivered the babies himself, according to New Jersey prosecutors. Ayinde also had nine kids with his ex-wife, Beverly, and at least three more with two other women in Brooklyn.

Prosecutors said Ayinde kept the kids from informing the authorities by beating them with wooden boards or kicking them with steel-toed boots.

“I was afraid to ever accuse him of being demented or being a pedophile,” Beverly Ayinde, who married him in 1977, told the court. “I knew the word, but I wouldn’t dare use it because it would result in a beating.”

Ayinde also made a point of moving his family from town to town, even squatting in an abandoned funeral home in New Jersey. Later, he moved to Brooklyn and began passing himself off as an artist, brazenly boasting his now-grown daughters were his wives.

More:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2010/03/11/2010-03-11_pure_evil_nj_fantatic_aswad_ayinde_charged_with_raping_daughters_

I hate to keep bringing you horror stories of child abuse, but perhaps it’s needed. We need resources allocated where they belong. I’m willing to bet this man was severely abused as a child.

Here is the story:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/national/2010/02/08/2010-02-08_us_soldier_joshua_taber_waterboarded_his_daughter_4_because_she_couldnt_recite_a.html

In a very sad saga, a woman named Katie Marie Tagle dated a man named Stephen Garcia and had a baby with him. Katie Marie has said that he abused her throughout their entire relationship.

She broke up with him, became involved with another man, and had to go to family court over custody and visitation of their infant son, Wyatt.

Stephen, enraged over Katie leaving him, began making multiple threats to take Katie’s life and the baby’s life and continued to be violent toward Katie, at one point proposing to her and then physically knocking her down during a child exchange.

Upon receiving these threats, Katie went to court to seek restraining orders, each of which the judges denied indicating that they believed Katie was lying to gain advantage in the pending custody proceedings.

The day after the third courtroom denial, Stephen sent Katie an e-mail containing a story called “Necessary Evil.”

The story describes in detail Katie’s and Stephen’s relationship, and in the end, the story has two endings. In “Happy Ending,” the female character returns to the man. In “Tragic Ending,” the character takes his son to a lake, puts him to sleep with Benadryl and the baby dies. “He will have a better life with you then (sic) we can give him here,” the man tells God before taking his own life.

Katie called 9-1-1 after reading the story, and the responding deputy immediately went to the courthouse and obtained an emergency restraining order for her.

However, in Victorville court Jan. 14, Judge Robert Lemkau would not uphold the restraining order and ordered Katie to immediately give Wyatt to Stephen, as it was the day his scheduled visitation was to begin.

The judge made it clear that he believed Katie was lying to gain an unfair advantage in custody proceedings. Then, instead of ensuring the child’s safety in the event the mother might be right, the judge decided to err on the side of endangering the child by ordering that the baby immediately be handed over unsupervised to the man who repeatedly threatened to take the child’s and the mother’s lives in writing.

Here is the incredible transcript to that hearing.

http://photos.vvdailypress.com/files/multimedia/soundslides/Court.pdf

This is nothing unusual. This goes on in courts all the time. In the presence of a custody dispute, judges routinely believe that anyone claiming abuse is doing so to gain unfair advantage in cutody proceedings, and routinely order the child then placed with the abuser, regularly going so far as to completely deny custody or visitation to the reporting parent.

What is unusual in this case is that within 10 days of that hearing, Stephen took Wyatt up into the mountains and killed the baby and himself, just as he had repeatedly warned.

Here is a detailed version of this story:

http://www.mountain-news.com/articles/2010/02/04/news/news1.txt

Murder-Suicide Note by CA Man Was Posted on Net

A judge in Wisconsin has ordered a mother jailed because her daughter will not comply with a court order to live every other week with an abusive father. The mother was ordered jailed 30 days or until the daughter complies and taken into custody immediately after the last court hearing where she presented evidence that the daughter is “terrified of going; she has night terrors and severe anxiety.”

Can this really be permitted to occur, using our nation’s judiciary power? Shouldn’t we have oversight procedures to ensure children are safe, rather than permitting court power to be used in such gruesome ways? Why would anyone believe that forcing a child to spend time alone with a parent with a history of abuse is a good thing to do? So many unanswered questions. Obviously, a child’s safety should always take precedence over a parent’s “rights”.

Further, how shocking is it that a court would threaten a child with the jailing of her own mother. The sort of guilt and shame the girl must feel must be unbelievable.

Judge Jails Mother Over Daughter’s Refusal To Visit Father, Now Public Crowd Powered Media, November 13, 2009.

Well, the story get even more shocking. Here is the next installment. Really just too much to believe: http://refusesvisitpressrelease.blogspot.com/2009/11/father-refuses-visitation.html#comments

The fact that horrible things are taking place in family courts all over America is no secret. Judges and other court officials are enabling child abuse and destroying children’s bond with protective parents!

Public protest over this despicable situation is growing.

http://capitalnews9.com/capital-region-news-12-content/your_news/capital_region/492704/hundreds-attend-battered-mothers-custody-conference

But we need more widespread awareness.

This is the result of unsupervised overnight visitation with his toddler given to a man with a history of violence:

Father indicted in scalding that led to amputation of son’s toes, Chicago Breaking News Center, December 9, 2009.

“Men’s rights” groups are growing in power. As the feminist movement has made some strides in issues of women’s rights, a powerful backlash has gathered momentum. Certain men have a drive to keep women in positions of pain and mistreatment. These groups label women fighting for freedom and equal rights as feminist extremists whose goal is make men’s lives difficult, claim that domestic violence laws are unfairly applied against innocent men when women are in fact equal abusers, and argue that women falsely cry abuse during custody cases, thus punishing men by refusing them custody.  The facts actually show that the percentage of domestic violence cases in which women are truly physically abusive against their husbands is close to 3%, that in fact the new stricter domestic violence laws are being applied against women who have used low levels of violence in self-defense, and that male abusers are in fact being routinely given custody while the women who report the abuse are losing custody under the guise of the supposed “Parental Alienation Syndrome”. In fact, a number of men are using these groups as a cover for continuing abusive behaviors against women and children. Please read this article publiched this week which has a well-written thorough overview of these issues: “Men’s Rights” Groups Have Become Frighteningly Effective, by Katherine Joyce, Double X, November 5, 2009.